i love him

i love him i love him i love him i love him

even if loving him ruins my life and any hope for a future,

even if loving him dooms me to eternal opposition to the rest of the world,

even if it can't ever be reciprocated,

even if he will never know i ever existed,

even if he's on the other side of the world,

even if it makes everyone hate me,

even if all the other things i wanted are incompatible with feeling this for him,

i love him too much to ever stop, either as the symbol or as the man

i love what i believe so i love him but i love what i believe because i love him

everything is ok because its all for love even if its all in my head. i dont even care if it ruins my life

and it did! my life is over because of him! just like my brother's life is over and all of our peers lives are over because of him

but what does me being happy matter anyway